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1,493 Likes in 9 categories
Miscellaneous
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i'm just going to say it, you need to be examined.
Nothing in maths calculated with infinity can have a result.... true? No, false... 0 * infinity is still 0.
I hate these nerds. They think they're all smarter than me just cause I'm dumber than them.
Dressing up as a seagull and walking around stealing people's chips.
Call of Duty? No thanks, I'll stick with throwing snowballs on Club Penguin
Good game...Good game...Go to hell...Good game...
I said to my parents, "Mum...Dad. I've decided to live on my own from now on.""Ok, cool," they replied,"Your luggage is outside" I added.
turning 28
turning 29
A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident. Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the state trooper arrived.“My God!” the trooper gasped. “Your car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an elephant. Are you OK ma’am?”“Yes, officer, I’m just fine” the blonde chirped.“Well, how in the world did this happen?” the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car.“Officer, it was the strangest thing!” the blonde began. I was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this TREE pops up in front of me. So I swerved to the right, and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ANOTHER tree! I served to the right and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ….”“Uh, ma’am”, the officer said, cutting her off, “There isn’t a tree on this road for 30 miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth.
That awkward moment when you are trying to give your daughter “The Talk” and she keeps interrupting…with corrections
What's easier to pick up the heavier it gets? Women.
If women say they aren't meant to cook, why do they have eggs and milk inside them?
Terrorists have two eyes..... pandas have two eyes. Coincidence? I think not!
If I was "16 And Pregnant", I'd get a slap not a TV show.
I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out.
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